THE LOST SCRIPTURE:
THE BOOK OF MURRAY

"Government Is Not God is a political action committee for social conservatives. We support candidates who are anti-abortion; candidates who will fight against the homosexual agenda; candidates who support the right of our kids to pray in public."

Who bare record of the word of God, and of the testimony of Newt Gingpac, and of all things that he saw.

I am Goodly and Godly, the beginning and the ending, saith the Newt, which is, and which was, and which is to come, the Great Googly Moogly.

I, Bill, who also am your brother, and companion in fundraising, and in the coffers and campaign of Newt Gingpac, was in the isle that is called Washington, for the word of God, and for the testimony of Newt Gingpac.

After this I looked, and, behold holy cow!, a door was opened in Congress: and the voice which I heard was as it were of a trumpet talking with me--maybe an oboe; which said, Come up hither yonder, and I will shew thee things which must be hereafter.

And immediately I was in the spirit: mood: and, gee whillikers, a throne was set in Congress, and one sat on the throne.

And round about the throne were four and twenty seats: and upon the seats I saw four and twenty elders sitting, clothed in white raiment; blackbirds baked in a pie, and they had on their heads crowns toques of gold.

And out of the throne proceeded lightnings and thunderings and voices (oh my!): and there were seven lamps rings of fire a'burnin' before the throne, which are the seven Spirits of God brides for seven brothers.

And before the throne there was like this sea of glass like, unto crystal: like really weird, you know? and in the midst of the throne, and round about the throne, were four beasts breasts beasts full of eyes before and behind.

And the first breast beast was like John Lennon, and the second breast beast like Roy Orbison, and the third breast beast had a face as a man Buddy Holly, and the fourth breast was like a flying eagle Elvis.

And the four breasts beasts had each of them six wings about him; and they were full of eyes within: and they rest not day and night they see you when you're sleeping; they know when you're awake, saying Good Golly Miss Molly and one for the Money, two for the Show and Doo Wa Doo Wa, the Great Googly Moogly, which was, and is, and is to come.

And when those breasts beasts give glory and honour and membership in GING-PAC for only five and twenty dollars per year to him that sat on the throne, who liveth for ever and ever,

The four and twenty blackbirds fall down before him that sat on the throne, and worship him that liveth for ever and ever, and cast their tithes before the throne, saying,

Thou art worthy, O Newt, to receive glory and honour and power and our last God-fearing red cent: for thou hast created destroyed all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created destroyed, most especially clinics and left-wing anti-family groups and literacy.

And I, Bill, saw these things, and heard them. And you didn't!